What Milk in My Tea Taught Me About Challenging My Self-Limiting Beliefs

I never thought I’d be writing a blog post about milk. Specifically, about milk in my tea.

For most of my adult life, I had a pretty hard-and-fast rule: no milk in my tea. I don’t know exactly when it started, probably in my twenties, but at some point, I “fell out of love” with milk in tea.

For years, I told myself I didn’t like it. I was certain of it. I was sure that milk in my tea tasted ‘meh’. I even repeated it to anyone who would listen, like a mantra: “I just don’t do milk in tea.”

A simple swirl…and an old belief begins to soften.

And then, a couple of weeks ago, something remarkable happened. I added milk to my tea.

It was on a bit of a whim, a quick decision prompted mostly by curiosity. And in that simple moment, I had to laugh. Turns out, I like milk in my tea. Not just like it, it was delightful.  Creamy, warm, comforting, the kind of little joy that made me pause and smile.

It got me thinking about how many “rules” we carry around for ourselves. You know the ones, the beliefs we accept without question. The things we think define us, or the habits we insist we “can’t” or “don’t” do. In my case, a tiny little beverage habit had turned into a hard boundary. I had limited myself for decades because of a story I told myself about who I am and what I like.

Here's the joyful truth: our beliefs aren't always fixed.

Science actually backs this up. Our brains are pattern-making machines. Neuroscientists explain that habits are reinforced neural pathways. They’re behaviors that repeat because the brain finds them efficient. Once a pathway is established, it becomes our default, often running without conscious thought. Beliefs about ourselves like “I don’t like milk in tea” get wired into the same networks. And the longer we hold them, the more automatic they become.

Mindfulness is about noticing these patterns without judgment. About seeing the rules we live by, questioning them, and choosing what actually serves us. In my case, mindfulness showed up as curiosity: What would happen if I tried milk in my tea again?  I didn’t have to overthink it. I didn’t have to debate with my past self. I just noticed the belief, the pattern, and then experimented.

Here’s the joyful truth: our beliefs aren’t always fixed. We get to rediscover ourselves every day, if we want, even in tiny, seemingly trivial ways. That little cup of tea taught me that curiosity is a superpower. It can transform habits, challenge self-limiting beliefs, and open doors to small, everyday pleasures we didn’t even realize we were missing.

So here’s my gentle invitation: notice the little things you do because “that’s just who you are” or “that’s how you’ve always done it.” Question them, play with them, and see what happens. You might discover new flavours, new ways of thinking, or just a little more joy.

And if all else fails, at least you’ll have a cup of tea that’s exactly the way you like it.